When it comes time to help a parent find a place in an elder care facility, the decision can be grueling and overwhelming. No child wants to take on the role of evil villain and make a parent do something they are adamantly against, even if it is the best decision for the health and well-being of the parent. Facing the guilt and coping with it can be a massive challenge and cause a great deal of stress. There are several things that you can do to help you cope with the guilt you feel when you decide to move a parent to an elder care facility.


Don't Do it Alone


If you are an only child you are trapped in the situation of being the one that has to be responsible for this decision. If you have other family members and siblings you can lean on them a little when it comes time to make the decision to move your parent to a new home. This will allow you the ability to discuss the reasons that moving Mom or Dad into an elderly home is the best decision and reinforce the reasons that you are doing it. It can be hard to remember the positive reasons for moving your loved one to a facility when you don't have someone to remind you. While doctors and nurses will reassure you, getting the word from someone in your personal life that knows and loves your parent as much as you do is far more weight baring.


Find Help in Numbers


You are not alone in the guilt that you feel over moving your parent(s) to an elder care facility. Seeking help in a support group for others in similar situations can often help to reassure you that you have made a good decision and that you are still a loving and caring child. You will also find these groups are an excellent resource for information about services that you can obtain for your elder or yourself. Ask around for information from your parent's physician or from the local hospital. They might be able to direct you to a group you can join.


Visit Often


Visiting your parent in an elder care facility might seem difficult at first, especially if they don't want to be there. The more often you visit the better you will feel about your decision as you see the care that they are getting and as you see how much they need the care provided. Consider having to care for your elderly parent on your own in your home and you will likely see how much better off they are in the new facility. While you might be well intentioned and willing to do the work, getting expert care can make all the difference for the quality of life of your parent(s).


The most important thing to remember when you feel guilt over moving your loved one to an elder care facility is that they are getting the services that best fit their needs and they have help whenever they need it, day or night. This is an important basic bit of information that might help you cope with the emotions that you will undoubtedly go through.